they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
