farters have to be the big spoon...
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
