Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
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