Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
