you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
