This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
Randomize
