I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize