Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
