There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize
