I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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