Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
