All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
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