After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Randomize
