I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
