he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
