He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
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I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
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His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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