You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
