Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
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