he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
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