you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Randomize
