I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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