tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
he just fucked me for my cheese.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize