I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize