I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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