Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
