im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
