She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Less talking, more tequila
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
