you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
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