Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
