We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
