After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
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