I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
