Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Randomize
