it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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