i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
