This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
