I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Randomize
