he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
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