I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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