they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
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i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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