Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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