My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I'm always down for nudity.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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