He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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