I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Randomize
