so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
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