just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize