I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
So vagazzling was a success
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂