he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
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