Where are you?
In a non slutty way
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Randomize