i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize
