We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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